Captain Demon Flash Bandit's Log-9/14/11

Captain Demon Flash Bandit's Log, Sept. 14, 2011

I was chosen once again by Star Fleet Dogster.com to be a log pick (diary pick) today. I suspect this is because of my vast experience flying around space taking care of the bad aliens. Just the other day, I found a planet full of fleas and I got out the Raid torpedo and killed them dead. I prefer killing them dead because killing them alive would mean that they are still around to pester a dog. I'm not the one that came up with the idea of killing them dead, but that was thanks to the ad agency that did the commercials for Raid. Yeah, I thought it was kind of redundant too, but who am I to complain about a company who gets rid of bugs? I'm just glad I got to those fleas before they reached the dog star. The dogs there do not like fleas anymore than us dogs on Earth like them.

We have a new science officer on board the ship. At least I think the new dog is the science officer because he is a lab. Yeah, I bet you didn't see that one coming. In fact, we even have a ship bouncer. He is the one who goes around telling the barking dogs that if they don't quit barking, he will pull the ship over and we will sit and wait until they quiet down. The chihuahuas hate him because they love to bark, but he likes quiet. A cat slipped on board and we put the cat in the brig. I personally don't mind cats, but some of the dogs hate them. He will be given his freedom when we get back to Earth.

That is it for today. This is Captain Demon Flash Bandit...soon to be Admiral Demon Flash Bandit signing off before going where no dog has gone before!!!

Demon Flash Bandit (Starship Captain)

Merry Christmas to all and to all a Good Nap!

Merry Christmas to all my readers!!!!! My Christmas was wonderful. The only bad thing about this blog is that it is taking me away from the treats I found for me under the tree. Angel Zoom Smokey's human Grandma sent Angel and me lots of gifts. I have already eaten the dingo bone and the tasty cinnamon apple bone. Those folks at dingo know what a dog loves! I also got lots of cool stuff from Santa Paws and my humans.

The humans are in the holiday spirit here. Jeff has been going through the house singing "Let's Have a Patrick Swayze Christmas This Year". I think it is his favorite Christmas song. The television show, MST3K, which is no longer on the air had a Christmas episode dedicated to the movie, Roadhouse, a movie in which Patrick Swayze starred as a bouncer. Youtube has it, and Jeff has been enjoying watching it. I have to admit, it is a catchy tune. Angel and I plan to surprise him and howl it for him later today.

I had the honor of having my diary chosen as a diary pick on Dogster.com today. Angel Zoom Smokey posted her letter to Santa Paws yesterday, and he did not come through with the $10 million she asked him to bring so if Rudolph knows what is best for him, he will not let Angel Zoom Smokey find him. You would think that Santa Paws would realize that Angel is serious when he wakes up before Christmas with a reindeer's head in his bed. She did warn him that she would start with Rudolph. You would think the big dog would listen!

Personally, I am very pleased with Mr. Santa Paws. I got a lot of cool stuff, but I happen to be easier to please than Angel is. I was born in a barn so I know how good I have it now. Angel has been spoiled since she was a puppy. My humans came and got me when I was about 8 weeks old, but I remember the days in the barn when I was being fed dog food--yes dog food. I don't like to even think about it. Think Burger King....think whopper....that is better.

This is Jesus birthday, and I'm sure he would appreciate it if the humans could learn to get along better with each other. I don't know why this is so difficult for the humans, but it would be a thoughtful gift.

I will end this blog with kind wishes for everyone to have a very merry Christmas and the best of everything in the new year!

Demon Flash Bandit
(Dog Who is Enjoying Christmas!)