Sunday, June 29, 2014

Special Order Pizza Should be on the Regular Menu

I am going to start this blog by sharing a link with my readers:

For those who don't have time or inclination to go to this site (and I know it is a traumatizing thought that you are leaving the Demon Flash Bandit blog), a child lost a tooth.  The child leaves a note for the tooth fairy which says:
Dear Tooth Fairy,
I love money and all, but may I have a pack of bacon instead?

Am I the only one who thinks a dog is behind this note?  Perhaps the family dog wrote it hoping the tooth fairy would leave bacon that the child can share with the dog; or better yet, give all of it to the dog.  I have already been on the telephone with my human's dentist asking him to save me all the teeth he pulls from the older humans.  The older humans don't get money from the tooth fairy.  That money is just for kids and (I'm assuming) dogs.  Therefore the older humans don't ask for the teeth back, and I can take home the ones that are available.Then I can ask for bacon.  I'm just sorry I didn't think of it sooner.  I wonder if Kevin Bacon asked the tooth fairy for bread, mayo, tomatoes, and lettuce.  Many of the humans love a BLT sandwich, but as far as this dog is concerned, I like a sandwich with just bacon--no bread, no mayo, no tomatoes, or lettuce---just delicious, mouth watering BACON!!!

This reminds me of the time I called Dominoes and ordered a pizza,.  I asked for a ham, bacon, and extra cheese pizza without the sauce or the crust.  The pizza place acted like I was crazy.  I think they are crazy for not having that on the menu.  It should not be a special order because I know lots of dogs that would prefer only those 3 items on the pizza.

Demon Flash Bandit (I Want Pizza-Hold the "Pizza)

Friday, June 27, 2014

Demon Flash Bandit: Treasure Hunter

Imagine my surprise and elation to find an ancient treasure map in a book I bought at a garage sale.  It was written by a famous pirate dog named Red Tail.  The humans, as usual, passed up his book because they do not realize how important he was in dog history.  This is why I always go to garage sales.  Most dogs don't bother to attend garage sales  because they assume that the humans don't have anything worth selling since they throw all their most valuable stuff away.  I can understand that way of thinking.  Why go to a sale if you think the human is only selling junk when you could be home taking a nap?    I got home and this book by Red Tail (entitled Red Tail's Treasures) was not only interesting reading since it included his many adventures which were well worth reading.  One of his adventures involved killing a  whole island full of birds which makes him my hero.  He is very much like the dogs I read about in a recent news story that had been killing (and probably eating) some endangered terns on Disappearing Island in Florida.  I might add an editorial comment at this point about how, in my opinion, all birds should be on the endangered species list because that is where they belong.  However, instead of "protecting" them, the humans should be trying to eradicate them!  Stupid humans!!!!  Anyway, despite the exciting adventures in the book, the best thing was that he included a treasure map so that a dog could follow the map and find his buried treasure.  I have already dug up the treasure so, at this point, I can share the map with my readers.  You didn't think I would share it if I didn't already have the treasure in my paws, did you?  I'm a dog--not a human, so I'm not stupid.  Here is what it said, and I have translated it from pirate into English:

Ahoy Matey Dogs, (Hi Dog Pals)

Argh Argh, I have a treasure that is more precious than gold.  (My treasure is more valuable than gold.)  I have buried it in a place that none but the devil and me can find it. (My treasure can only be discovered by myself or Demon Flash Bandit.)   Take 3 paces past the tree that I marked with my unique smell.  (Go 3 feet past the tree on which I peed.)  You will find a rock that has a picture I scratched of a bird dying.  (I couldn't resist drawing a nice picture on a rock.)  Take 5 paces past the rock, and you will find a pile of sticks.  (I piled up some sticks to play with so I'll have something to do while retrieving my treasure.  ( Go 5 feet to a pile of sticks I plan to play with later.)  Take 5 paces to the left, and you will see a giant X that marks the spot.  (Go 5 feet to the left and you will see a giant X spray painted on the ground.)  Use front paws to dig up the treasure.  (Start digging.)  Instead of all that trouble, I just went to the back yard and looked for the X.  I have napping to do so I don't want to waste time with silly hunting.

When I got to the treasure, I must tell you that I must be the luckiest dog in the world!  It is full of real bones, dingo bones, milkbones, bacon, dog toys, and all sorts of thing a dog loves.  It even has a get out of baths card that can be used whenever a dog needs it.

The point of this blog is that sometimes a dog has to stay awake and go to some garage sales in order to get treasures!  I hope you find treasure too!

Demon Flash Bandit (Treasure Hunter)

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Tyrannasaurus Tex

Angel Zoom Smokey's favorite food in the world is chicken.  Yesterday she was outside in the yard digging a hole.  I asked her why she was digging the hole.  She said she is going to plant some eggplant because she wants to grow some chickens.  I genuinely don't think that is how you get chickens, but it does sound logical so I can't argue with her thinking.  I wonder what you have to plant to get hamburgers because I can use some of them.  I guess I will have to look through some seed catalogs to see what I need to plant to get them.  I hope this does not make Angel a vegetarian because I am against dogs being vegetarians.  I say dogs are meat eaters like the great and mighty tyranasaurus rex.  In fact, I have a pal who is a dinosaur of that persuasion.  He lives in Texas and is called Tyranasurus Tex.

Demon Flash Bandit (Farmer Demon)

Monday, June 23, 2014

Dog Included in Yearbook

Hold the applause....I am back writing another diary entry.  Never mind, I love applause so clap as much as you like!

Today's subject is something I saw on the Internet that I liked a lot.  There is a young human girl who has occasional seizures so she has a "service" dog that goes to school with her. I know this happens everyday with many people because there are many service dogs doing valuable tasks for the humans.  What makes this story different is the intelligence and good taste of the school yearbook staff.  They included the dog's picture next to hers in the yearbook.  This did my heart good.  After all, the dog was attending classes everyday with the human so the dog was also getting bored by the teachers, and probably helped a lot of the other kids get through the day.  I think Taxi is a very lucky dog to be in the yearbook.  I wonder.....are dogs allowed to sleep in class.  If so, I could go to school myself.  I get A's on naptime report cards.

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Gets His Due)G

Saturday, June 21, 2014

A Dog's Job is to Kill Birds

Occasionally a dog sees some good news on the Internet.  Today I am referring to a story about Disappearing Island in Florida.  There are some rare terns (a bird species) that are on the island.  Scientists and birdologists think that there were some dogs running free on the island who are responsible for the birds dying.  They are trying to locate the humans who let the dogs run loose and they face possible prosecution.  As usual, I am shocked that they aren't hunting for the dogs to present them with a medal.  If you ask me, those are heroic dogs who should be admired by the rest of us dogs.  They are responsible for a lot of bird deaths.  Obviously those were dogs who regularly read my blog..  I doubt if there is even one dog who is upset over this news item.  Even my own human said it was sad that so many birds died.  I barked at her and told her it is a good thing. matter how much wisdom their dogs bark at them, they are still stupid!  Here is the link for those who want to read the article:

Continue to pay no attention to the humans....kill birds just like those heroic dogs in Florida!  I wish my humans would let me run free to kill birds!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dogs Are Supposed to Kill Birds)

Friday, June 20, 2014

Monster Boo Boo

From what I've seen on the Internet today, the Here Comes Honey Boo Boo show is going to be changed to  Here Comes Monster Boo Boo.  I must admit that I do not watch the show, and I am definitely not a fan.  I do not understand why this kid is in beauty contests when my paw is cuter than she is.  Of course, I'm sure my readers already know this fact and are wondering why I don't enter my paw into a beauty pageant.  I don't want the humans to feel bad when they lose to a dog's paw.  The humans have enough ego problems as it is.

I will admit I did watch one episode of the show just to be fair because, as a dog movie and television critic, I have to evaluate all shows.  After one episode, I had enough of watching it.  It wasn't a good show.  Little Alana is not a sweet, cute child, and if the humans can't understand why she is turning out badly, then they are lacking in common sense.  If my human Grandmother was alive (Mommy's mom) she would have dubbed them "white trash", and never have watched the show either.  In fact, most of the humans in their generation (depression and WW2) would not have had much patience for the show.  What did Alana do that was so horrible?  She hit her mother on national television.  I find this humorous for so many reasons.  Parents are told not to spank their children, and how is that working out for them?  Not well, from this dog's observation.  Children are children and need to be guided by adults--not the other way around.  Of course, all the humans need the guidance of their dogs, but that is just a fact that everyone knows.  By the way, Mama dogs do get onto their puppies when the puppies are out of line.  Perhaps Mama June needs a lesson in how to be a good mother from a dog.  If a puppy gets too far out of line, the humans can even put the dog down.  Is that fair?  The humans can use capital punishment on a dog, but Honey Boo Boo is still alive and well and doing her own show.  I think that the world needs to be taken over by us dogs before the humans mess it up any more than it already is.

Meanwhile, if you don't care for Honey Boo Boo, quit watching her show.  As long as humans watch, it will continue to be on the air, and Honey Boo Boo will never learn to behave.

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who is Not a Fan of Honey Boo Boo)

Thursday, June 19, 2014

I Never Poop--It is Beneath Me

I have been writing my blog for years now, and I seldom confess to my readers that I have any faults and I have many.  Just ask my fellow dog and roommate, Angel Zoom Smokey, who did not make a computer heist and write this blog today.  First and foremost, despite what I say, I do poop.  This is because there is even a book called Everybody Poops.  I have always said the book is Everybody Poops Except Demon Flash Bandit, but the scientific fact is that everyone does, indeed, poop.  Angel Zoom Smokey has been telling everyone that for years; and I have always denied the truth; but, alas, as usual, she is right!  In fact, Angel Zoom Smokey is always right about everything.  I should be nicer to her and give her the first crack at all treats.  In fact, she deserves all of them, and I should go without!

What the dog?  I don't remember starting this blog, but I guess I must have started it before my last nap.  I guess I could proofread what I wrote; but since I wrote it, I'm sure it is brilliant and does not need to be proofread.  Speaking of naps, I was just having a nice dream about how I was put in charge of running the world because of my genius and my ability to negotiate with the humans.  My first order was to kill all the stupid birds.  Then the world became a wonderful, happy place for everyone (except the birds of course).  I love it when I have such good dreams.  If only it could become a reality and a dog could walk outside without fear of being hit by a "bird bomb".  I hate bird poop.  Birds should be like me and not poop!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Does Not Poop)

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Don't Eat the Flag!

I wrote a blog yesterday about the recipe in Better Homes and Gardens involving the' United States flag cake'.  After I wrote it, I wondered if it is really okay to eat a flag anyway.  There are many rules involving flag usage, and it occurred to me that eating a flag might not be particularly respectful.  Therefore, as a dog who you can depend on to do the proper research, I checked into it, and I am going to share a link on flag etiquette for the dogs who want to make sure they are doing everything properly.

Although it does not specifically mention eating the flag, it does say that flags cannot be put on disposable products such as paper plates so I'm guessing that you aren't supposed to "eat" a flag.  Perhaps the editors at the magazine should have checked into this subject a bit more diligently. I suppose that flags on a toothpick aren't acceptable either, but since you don't have to throw them away, they might be okay.  I told my humans just to celebrate properly by serving my twinkies without the flag.  I have to set an example for the other dogs out there.  It is part of my job as a dog blogger to do the right thing at all times.  I plan to celebrate Independence Day by catching a couple of birds and throwing them on the grill.  There is nothing disrespectful about that unless you catch an endangered species, and don't even get me started on why the humans protect ANY bird species.  All of them need to be wiped out!

Demon Flash Bandit (Planning My Independence Day Celebration)

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Demon Flash Bandit's Magazine for Dogs

In my last blog, I wrote about a local puppy mill, and today I am going to share a follow up on that blog for those who are interested in reading a happy ending:

I was pawing through my human's latest issue of Better Home and Gardens magazine, and I didn't see anything of interest to a dog except for some of the food advertisements.  If that magazine wants more dogs to subscribe, I would suggest they publish more dog approved articles.  Anyway, in the recipe section, there was the usual "patriotic" cake for July 4.  It is sad that the humans bother to try these recipes.  Let's face it, those recipes are usually things like "how many ways you can make beets taste better than lousy!  This dog does not eat beets and neither do my humans.  I'm not even sure if my humans have ever even bought a beet, but I'm sure they wouldn't like them.  The only way I would eat a beet is if it were covered in peanutbutter, and then I would just lick off the peanutbutter and leave the stupid beet.  I also see no reason to eat eggplant until it becomes a chicken.  Most of us dogs aren't fond of vegetables, and I'm the first in line to avoid them.  Anyway, this blog is not about how useless vegetables are to a dog, but back to the cake.  Whenever there is a patriotic holiday, the magazines always publish a recipe involving a cake that has blueberries and strawberries or raspberries decorating it--with either whipped cream or frosting for the white color (the only part of the cake worth eating if you ask me).  As a favor to the humans who seem to already have enough work to do without having to bake a cake, I have a better recipe for a patriotic dessert.  All you have to do is purchase some pre-made cakes.  I prefer Hostess myself, but any will do; and the store brands are fine if you are on a budget.  Once you have purchased the ding dongs, ho hos, or twinkies, get a package of small United States flags on toothpicks, open the individually wrapped packages, put a flag on each one, and put them on a serving tray.  Let the humans have the chocolate cakes and the dogs get the twinkies.  At least that is the consensus I have gotten from the dogs I have talked to about this subject.  The best thing about this recipe other than it is much easier for the human;, is that there is not stupid fruit ruining the flavor.  Whenever you put something "good for you" into a dessert, it ruins the flavor.  If you try my recipe, let me know how much the dogs enjoyed the twinkies.  Then do something useful like cancel your humans subscription to Better Homes and Gardens, and subscribe to my blog or my new magazine, Demon Flash Bandit's Magazine for Dogs which will soon be on the shelves of your local store.

Demon Flash Bandit (Editor of New Magazine)

Sunday, June 15, 2014

Local Puppy Mill???

Imagine my surprise when I got onto the Internet today to find a local story that I had not yet read about.  I suppose this strengthens the argument that one should read their local newspapers!  For any humans reading this, of course we dogs argue about such things.  What do you think we are barking about?  Anyway, according to the news, 91 Whoodles (a new "designer" breed made up of poodle and wheaten terriers) were seized by Livingston County Animal Control.  It is hard to believe that such abuse was happening in the same township where I, Demon Flash Bandit, lives.  Here is the link so that the dogs who want to know more details on what they are barking about to other dogs will know the full story:

I will also share the link with the website for the breeder:

I have never been to the farm so I can't speak from personal experience, but the puppies on the website do not look mistreated.  However, if you are a human and you are trying to make money from puppies, you aren't going to post photos of abused dogs.  In the interest of being fair, I am presenting both "sides" because there are times when the humans in charge do make up false charges.  However, I don't think too many humans can handle 91 dogs at once.  According to the article, 2 dogs are now over the bridge due to medical issues.  The rest can be adopted.

Now I want to say something important about "designer breeds".  Many of us are AKC registered dogs which means we have a certain lineage of which the humans are aware.  It is kind of like being one of the American humans whose ancestors arrived at Plymouth Rock on the Mayflower (and if they had dogs, their dogs immediately watered a nearby tree). Dogs who are "mixtures" are considered "mutts".  Mutts are fine dogs and should not feel bad about not having papers because, as Triumph the Insult Dog would say, "the human's papers are great....for me to poop on".  If you ask my opinion (and you are going to get it whether you ask or not), the reason so many dogs are in puppy mills is because the humans are so silly about the "papers".  Now the papers aren't as important, but they want "designer" dogs.  Here is what I think:  we dogs are each worth millions...nay billions of dollars each.  How many humans can afford a puppy at that price?  Since they can't afford a puppy at that price, we dogs provide them at far more affordable prices.  I have no problem with some of the humans breeding us and selling our puppies to qualified humans, but I don't care for any of the humans who mistreat us dogs.  There is no excuse, and if the authorities who took the dogs are telling the truth (and chances are they are honest), then that human should be ashamed of mistreating the dogs in their charge.  I say put them in jail!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dispensing Doggy Justice)

Friday, June 13, 2014

Movie Review: How To Train Your Dragon 2

In this sequel to the animated movie, How to Train Your Dragon, Hiccup and Toothless return 5 years later.  The Vikings are enjoying their new sport, dragon racing, and Hiccup and Toothless are busy mapping out new uncharted territories.  They find an ice cave and a bunch of wild dinosaurs and the mysterious Dragon Rider which is what begins a whole new adventure for the two.  I won't tell you anymore because you should see this movie for yourself, but I did like the movie very much.  In fact, Toothless is a lot like Angel Zoom Smokey and myself.  Angel did not approve of his love of tummy rubs.  She said tummy rubs are for dogs--not for dragons, but she said she can't blame a dragon for trying to get one.  She does LOVE tummy rubs.  I give this movie 4 paws up, 5 minutes of tail wags, a bunch of sloppy kisses (so much better than non-sloppy kisses), a couple of doggy dances, and a tummy rub.  Yes, why not a tummy rub for a dragon?  Toothless is a very cool dragon!  This would be a 9 out of 10 on the human movie scale--maybe even a 10.  This is a must see movie, and it is highly recommended by me, Demon Flash Bandit!

Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Critic)

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Guns that Shoots Snacks: I Approve

My brother Jeff must have a case of "Ghostbusters" on the brain because yesterday he got the Marshmallow man in the mail.  Today he got a poster of the movie.  I think I need to take over that kid's Amazon account because I know they sell very tasty dog treats and nice dog toys on Amazon that I would enjoy.  I could care less about a non-edible Marshmallow man or a movie poster.  The humans make a marshmallow gun which shoots marshmallows at a dog.  I can see the wisdom of ordering one of them.  Angel Zoom Smokey and myself do not mind being shot with marshmallows or anything soft and edible.  For the convenience of my dog readers out there, here is a link that can hook you up with one, but it isn't the only place you can order so feel free to "shop around".

I'm hoping that Jeff will read this blog and order a gun that can be delivered by next week.  This dog could use some marshmallows as a snack.  By the way, I have read that most marshmallows now are not actually made from "marshmallows" so, if any of you know anything about this conspiracy of keeping real marshmallows away from us dogs, let me know so I can cover it in my next blog entry.

Demon Flash Bandit (Go Ahead and Shoot Some Marshmallows at Me)

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Marshmallow Man is Not Edible

I will never understand the logic of the humans.  My brother Jeff got a package today that he had ordered on the Internet.  First and foremost, I sniffed the package to make sure it didn't have antrax or a bomb in it.  We dogs are always on the job protecting our humans.  Once I gave it the "okay" we opened the package, and inside it was an inflatable Marshmallow  Man from the Ghostbuster movie..  Do you know how annoying it is for a dog to open a package and see the word, marshmallow, and find out that there are no edible marshmallows in the box?   It is just a giant balloon type character.  What is the point of ordering anything that is not edible anyway?  When this dog places an order, you can be sure that it will involve treats that are to be eaten.   Perhaps I need to hack into Jeff's accounts to make sure that the next time he spends money, it is on  something I will enjoy eating.  It shouldn't be hard since I think his password is "Demonflashbanditneedstreats.  Wait a minute, that is my password!  What could Jeff's password be.  I know--Iamastupidhuman?  That sounds like a perfect password to me, but what do all the other humans use as their password.  By the way, be sure and "forget" my password unless you want to buy me treats, then feel free to use it all the time.

Demon Flash Bandit (Disappointed With Human)

Sunday, June 8, 2014

Movie Review: A Million Ways to Die in the West

My movie review today is of the movie by Seth McFarlane, A Million Ways to Die in the West.  This movie is a spoof of the classic type western and probably more accurate a portrayal of what life was actually like on the western frontier in that time period than in the average Hollywood western.  I doubt that living in some of those frontier towns was fun or easy.  In fact, without electricity, central heating and air conditioning, and many of the other "creature" comforts that us dogs enjoy, I'm guessing life wasn't that good when you didn't live on the frontier either.  I found this movie a bit disappointing because most of the funniest things were already shown in the trailer so I went to it expecting it to be super funny, and although funny,  it was a bit disappointing because my expectations were so high.  This movie should have had a cameo from Ted, and it would have made it better.  Ted is probably too busy making a sequel.  Stuffed bears, like us blogging dogs, have busy schedules.  I do give this movie 4 paws up, a tail wag, and a couple of drooling kisses.  This would be about a 7 out of 10 on the human movie scale.  I may have been a bit disappointed, but it was still a funny movie and a good way to spend a couple of hours being entertained.  Let's face it, not all movies can be as good as Snow Dogs or Eight Below, and this movie did at least have the good sense to have a dog in a prominent role in the movie.  I guess McFarlane knew that a dog would make it better and I give him my one paw salute for realizing that!

Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Critic)

Saturday, June 7, 2014

Kill Two Birds With One Stone

Some good news on the Internet today!!!  Utah is allowing hunters to kill crows because they are causing problems.  (They are birds...of course, they are going to cause problems.)  My secretary has informed me that Utah is part of the United States, but I don't believe her.  I've never heard of Utah until today, but after reading the news, I have to admit that I have a whole new respect for Utah.  If it isn't a state, I will even allow it to become one!  I doubt that it matters since I don't think any humans or dogs live there.  Crows are some of the world's most useless birds because they aren't even good eating.  When someone has to eat something awful, the humans refer to it as "eating crow".  I am very pleased to see some humans taking the proper stand on birds....I hope they are familiar with the adage, "kill two birds with one stone".  It is one of my personal favorite quotes.

If you want to read more details about this news item, here is the link:

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Against Birds)

Friday, June 6, 2014

Don't Eat Salmon Named Ella

There is a new food scare out there that has nothing to do with dog food.  This time it is the human food that is affected.  Costcos has announced a possible problem with salmonella.  I think this is one of the humans silly recalls because I've been eating salmon since I was a puppy, and I have never had any problems with tainted salmon.  Obviously, the problem is with salmons named Ella so all a dog has to do is ask the salmon its name, and if it is not named Ella, it is good eating.  Until then, all the humans are welcome to send me their salmon so I can eat it and let them know whether or not it is good.  It is my public service to the humans for the week.  I won't get sick since I know to avoid the ones named Ella.  By the way, why not be on the safe side and send all bacon you have with it.  I think salmon and bacon would taste good together.  Bacon can only improve a dish!

Demon Flash Bandit (Waiting on Salmon)

Thursday, June 5, 2014

Flight Landed Over Dog Poop!

A flight from Los Angeles to Philadelphia was forced to land the plane in Kansas City because a service dog pooped on the flight and the humans had to land to clean it. Evidently, they ran out of paper towels with which to clean the mess.  The smell was making some of the humans sick.  My guess is that the dog was probably a bit sick because service dogs usually don't do things like that.  I'm sure that you, like me, are probably thinking; how do they treat the situation if it were a human that pooped on the aisle of the plane?   Do they also land the plane when a human gets a stomach ache?  Of course not.  You know that they only landed the plane because it was a dog who had the "accident".  Whenever an event involves a dog, the humans always seem to get crazy with their reactions.  I think I would have found something to clean the mess-even if it was someone's newspaper or magazine, and then I would have sold the the poop on Ebay.  I suspect that is why they landed the plane in the first place.  If the poop makes Internet headlines, it is easier to sell it for a big price on Ebay.  It becomes famous dog poop, and the humans will buy pretty much anything if it belonged to a celebrity!  Here is the link for those who want to read more details:

Demon Flash Bandit (Selling Things on Ebay)

Monday, June 2, 2014

Two and a Half Men Should Have Been Cancelled

Mommy bought the 10th season of Two and a Half Men earlier this week.  I don't think that the show can be classified as a comedy anymore.  The only thing that Mommy laughed at was when they had a dog on the scene.  The dog was funny, but I thought it was a bit insulting to the dog because no one wanted the dog and all the humans were trying to get rid of him.  It is a shame because he was the one holding the show together.  When he was gone, there was nothing funny about the show at all.  If you ask my opinion, they should have stopped the show when Charlie Sheen left.  Perhaps if they had made the show a bit more believable, it might have worked.  However, when a billionaire buys a house and allows the relatives of the former owner to stay, it gets stupid.  In fact, Charlie Harper was trying to get rid of Allan more so than Walden (the billionaire).  I never understood why they cast Ashton in the part anyway.  He is a handsome guy, but not necessarily a great actor judging from how badly his movies have done over the years.  It also was not wise to change the other actors.  Allan was the "moral compass" of the show, and he is no longer the "good guy".  He is more like his brother Charlie than he was in the past.  If you have some time to spare and you haven't seen this show, do yourself a favor and skip watching the newer seasons of Two and a Half Men.  They are bad!

Demon Flash Bandit (Movie and Television Critic)